In The Kitchen With Jesus
A few days ago I started my day early. For me that meant I got up while Good Morning America was just starting. That is early for Leland.
Louisville's own Diane Sawyer was doing a show on "Faith Based Diets". (Not that it matters but Diane was Junior Miss from Louisville I think) Her guests included three people that between them lost a million pounds. Give or take. Their claim was that a Christian Faith based diet changed their life.
I was up, it was early and the remote was across the room. I listened. The guests talked about a book, although there are many on the subject, they had all used the same one. The title I've let go, something like "In The Kitchen With Jesus" or "Would You Like GOD With That?" They had all lost weight and became closer to God using this book and the Bible as key tools. The idea is that in the Bible there are mentions of how to care for our bodies. Not that it says 'Thou shall go to a gym five times a week', but between the lines the book outlines how not only cleanliness is next to Godliness but also healthiness, and in what parts of the Bible to read and how to interpret it to sell the book. I mean apply it's wisdom. Gluttony is the word that really tied the whole thing together.
So, the message was that to be fat is to slap God in the face. "I gave you that body and look what you did to it!" kinda thing. As a result of deepening their faith and getting closer to God the three people had learned deep hidden truths about themselves that only the love of God could give them strength to see. That is moving and I'm truly happy for all three of them and anyone that finds deeper meaning in our human existence through faith. Be it organized religion or a more free lance faith like mine. Their individual stories varied but each turned to food to cope. I have eaten an entire German Chocolate cake in the bath tub during some bad times. I had the ass to prove it. I feel their pain.
The book asked that they not go eat but pray and read the Bible. With the book to guide them. To ask "why do you want all the donuts and not just one?". To ask themselves the hard questions. I could see how it worked. I got the idea. Not only because I too, like to think food is love. But the concept was familiar. In fact Susan Powder told us this gospel twenty years ago (when I was a very young child). She said then "It's not what you're eating. It's what's eating you!" We were eating to hide our insecurities. Only to create more reasons to be insecure. "Know it, own it and deal with it!" she'd say. The Dr. Phil of the day. Hard core even. "Your husband dumped you, that's too damn bad. Get off your ass and lets go for a walk".
God however is nicer about it and in exchange for devoted faith you can deal with whatever sadness you've known and loose weight. I hope many people are healthier because of this but I fear God is being used to market diet books. Even the publisher said it was a perfect match. That the Bible is the top selling book ever and God and diets sell books.
I should have seen this coming. A few years ago I went to South East Christian Church to see the Easter 'Pageant'. More like "The Greatest Easter Extravaganza On The Planet" with live camels and horses. I saw the show three times over three years. Every time a live dove was trained to fly across the theatre at South East Christian Church, that is bigger than Center for the Arts I'd guess, and land on the well defined shoulder of Jesus on the cross. Lets just say that there must have been a Solo flex-in-home -gym in Jesus's condo. The man hired to play Jesus had no more than a two percent body fat ratio. What more proof could you want, there is a God and his son is now an Ambercrombie and Fitch model.
Good Morning America went on to report that the Jewish faith is the leanest. Methodists then Catholics. We get bigger still on down to Baptists and Protestants etc. Suffice to say that if the only exercise you get is handling live snakes in church, you're probably over weight.
God bless my sandwich. I'll do Pilates for Jesus on Sunday.
Louisville's own Diane Sawyer was doing a show on "Faith Based Diets". (Not that it matters but Diane was Junior Miss from Louisville I think) Her guests included three people that between them lost a million pounds. Give or take. Their claim was that a Christian Faith based diet changed their life.
I was up, it was early and the remote was across the room. I listened. The guests talked about a book, although there are many on the subject, they had all used the same one. The title I've let go, something like "In The Kitchen With Jesus" or "Would You Like GOD With That?" They had all lost weight and became closer to God using this book and the Bible as key tools. The idea is that in the Bible there are mentions of how to care for our bodies. Not that it says 'Thou shall go to a gym five times a week', but between the lines the book outlines how not only cleanliness is next to Godliness but also healthiness, and in what parts of the Bible to read and how to interpret it to sell the book. I mean apply it's wisdom. Gluttony is the word that really tied the whole thing together.
So, the message was that to be fat is to slap God in the face. "I gave you that body and look what you did to it!" kinda thing. As a result of deepening their faith and getting closer to God the three people had learned deep hidden truths about themselves that only the love of God could give them strength to see. That is moving and I'm truly happy for all three of them and anyone that finds deeper meaning in our human existence through faith. Be it organized religion or a more free lance faith like mine. Their individual stories varied but each turned to food to cope. I have eaten an entire German Chocolate cake in the bath tub during some bad times. I had the ass to prove it. I feel their pain.
The book asked that they not go eat but pray and read the Bible. With the book to guide them. To ask "why do you want all the donuts and not just one?". To ask themselves the hard questions. I could see how it worked. I got the idea. Not only because I too, like to think food is love. But the concept was familiar. In fact Susan Powder told us this gospel twenty years ago (when I was a very young child). She said then "It's not what you're eating. It's what's eating you!" We were eating to hide our insecurities. Only to create more reasons to be insecure. "Know it, own it and deal with it!" she'd say. The Dr. Phil of the day. Hard core even. "Your husband dumped you, that's too damn bad. Get off your ass and lets go for a walk".
God however is nicer about it and in exchange for devoted faith you can deal with whatever sadness you've known and loose weight. I hope many people are healthier because of this but I fear God is being used to market diet books. Even the publisher said it was a perfect match. That the Bible is the top selling book ever and God and diets sell books.
I should have seen this coming. A few years ago I went to South East Christian Church to see the Easter 'Pageant'. More like "The Greatest Easter Extravaganza On The Planet" with live camels and horses. I saw the show three times over three years. Every time a live dove was trained to fly across the theatre at South East Christian Church, that is bigger than Center for the Arts I'd guess, and land on the well defined shoulder of Jesus on the cross. Lets just say that there must have been a Solo flex-in-home -gym in Jesus's condo. The man hired to play Jesus had no more than a two percent body fat ratio. What more proof could you want, there is a God and his son is now an Ambercrombie and Fitch model.
Good Morning America went on to report that the Jewish faith is the leanest. Methodists then Catholics. We get bigger still on down to Baptists and Protestants etc. Suffice to say that if the only exercise you get is handling live snakes in church, you're probably over weight.
God bless my sandwich. I'll do Pilates for Jesus on Sunday.
posted by Leland at 1:56 PM
1 Comments:
I loved this one!
Post a Comment
<< Home