"Who's y'er Daddy?"
My new favorite quote is from the movie Short bus. It is “I used to want to change the world, but now I just want to leave the room with a little dignity.” In a way it sounds like giving up. It could also mean too pick your battles carefully to ensure a dignified exit.
I have a new city, employer and life to entertain me with challenges. It seems the one creature I failed to prepare for this new life is the one most effected by it. My first night in the city with my dog required me leaving her at home alone. She barked nonstop until the doorman called us at dinner and asked us to return home. It was the first of many complaints from our new neighbors. They love us!
To make this work I called a personal dog trainer, a specialist in separation anxiety. My dog now has an aroma theropy pheromone diffuser and an ultrasonic anti-bark machine. She takes Prozac every day and a Valium every time I leave the house. It sounds extreme yet she still managed to paw at the front door until she set the deadbolt from inside. A lock I did not have a key to. I stood in the hall trying to open the door. I imagined my dog sitting on the sofa yelling at the door “Who’s got separation anxiety now Daddy!”
Once inside I have started to wonder if I’m doing the right thing for my dog. I’m fighting to make this work for both of us. Have I picked the right battle? I’m not trying to change the world, just a dog. I only want to change her enough so that I can leave the house with a little dignity.
One of us needs the pills. This might go on for six months I’m told. We will both need rehab if this goes on that long. The neighbors are ready for this to be over. Truthfully, I am too. I have tried not to let this situation become my world so I went to see a movie that begins with autofellatio. A nice distraction but my world was waiting at the door when I got home.
I have a new city, employer and life to entertain me with challenges. It seems the one creature I failed to prepare for this new life is the one most effected by it. My first night in the city with my dog required me leaving her at home alone. She barked nonstop until the doorman called us at dinner and asked us to return home. It was the first of many complaints from our new neighbors. They love us!
To make this work I called a personal dog trainer, a specialist in separation anxiety. My dog now has an aroma theropy pheromone diffuser and an ultrasonic anti-bark machine. She takes Prozac every day and a Valium every time I leave the house. It sounds extreme yet she still managed to paw at the front door until she set the deadbolt from inside. A lock I did not have a key to. I stood in the hall trying to open the door. I imagined my dog sitting on the sofa yelling at the door “Who’s got separation anxiety now Daddy!”
Once inside I have started to wonder if I’m doing the right thing for my dog. I’m fighting to make this work for both of us. Have I picked the right battle? I’m not trying to change the world, just a dog. I only want to change her enough so that I can leave the house with a little dignity.
One of us needs the pills. This might go on for six months I’m told. We will both need rehab if this goes on that long. The neighbors are ready for this to be over. Truthfully, I am too. I have tried not to let this situation become my world so I went to see a movie that begins with autofellatio. A nice distraction but my world was waiting at the door when I got home.
posted by Leland at 11:32 AM
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